If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
