I think I died a long time ago.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
