Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize