with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize