He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
