wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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