she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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