yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
