ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize