Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Randomize
