Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
