i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
