He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
