Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
he just fucked me for my cheese..
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize