Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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