I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
