Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize