You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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