Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Randomize
