I bet he comes in French.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
