Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
