i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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