i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
