Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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