it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize