im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
