you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I pour the whiskey from now on
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize