If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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