real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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