will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
