saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
only if we run a train.
done.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize