I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize