he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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