You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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