Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
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