Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize