She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
