i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
