I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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