dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
