her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
