this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
