they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
