i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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