i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
