That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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