Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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