She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
