You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
My vagina just recognized that song.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
