I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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