EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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